When Ernie came home with the news that he'd gotten laid for the first time, his mother was less than pleased. Slapping him across the face, she sent him off to his room without any supper. When Ernie's father got home and heard the news, he went up to see his son.
"Well, my boy," he admonished, secretly pleased, "I hope you learned something from this experience."
"You bet I did," admitted his son. "Next time I use Vaseline ... my ass is killing me!"
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